


Overprotective

by JohnVM



Category: South Park
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, Just think of it as eventual Creek, M/M, One-Sided Relationship, Sexuality Crisis, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-17
Updated: 2017-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:35:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22385776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JohnVM/pseuds/JohnVM
Summary: When an ecstatic Tweek suggests there may finally be a way out of the fake relationship they've been crafting for years, Craig begins to realize there may be more to his feelings of protectiveness for his friend than he previously thought. Oneshot.
Relationships: Craig Tucker/Tweek Tweak, Tweek Tweak/Rebecca Cotswolds
Comments: 3
Kudos: 25





	Overprotective

**Author's Note:**

> If you went back in time a deace plus and told me, one day I would unironically write a Creek fanfic, I’d probably make some kind of vague, unconvincing but angry threat. Have a drabble. (This was originally written in 2017, some formatting may be lost on AO3.)

Every day after school, Tweek Tweak and Craig Tucker had to walk home together. 

It had started as one of those dumb things they were basically forced to do, socially, to convince people that they were back 'together', another part of that romantic relationship they’d been forced to create to meet the expectations of those around them... but it wasn't really so bad, honestly. 

“I swear, Craig, it’s like Mr. Garrison doesn’t realize we have other c-classes now.” Tweek mumbled under his breath, holding the straps of his backpack as if it might disappear, “I mean, nngh, how am I going to finish three essays in one week?” he jittered, removing his thermos from the backpack for a quick sip of coffee before replacing it.

“Yeah, tell me about it.” Craig shrugged, shaking his head, “Garrison’s such a tool. I don’t know how he keeps following our class every year.” he rolled his eyes, “Oh, hey, are we still on to hold hands at Stark’s Pond later?”

“Yeah, totally.” Tweek nodded, knowing they had to keep the charade up. There was a moment of silence, and a quick twitch jerking Tweek’s head and messy blonde hair out of line a bit, “Th-that reminds me. I wanted to talk to you about something. You know Rebecca C-Cotswolds? The home-schooled girl who just transferred in?” Tweek asked, a grin spreading across his face.

“I know Mark Cotswolds, me and him have History together.” Craig raised an eyebrow. “You mean his sister?” he recalled vaguely from when Mark had first joined their class back in the third grade.

“N-no, yeah, she’s his sister.” Tweek explained, “I almost forgot to tell you... she came up to me after Garrison’s class today... s-she wanted to help me study. I-I told her she didn’t have to b-but she kind of insisted.” he replied.

“That’s really weird. I mean, she couldn’t just leave you alone?” Craig asked, stopping in his tracks and giving a look of concern, “Was she being honest? How often do people really want to study with you? I mean-”

“W-wait... it gets weirder...” Tweek replied, “S-she touched me on the arm. Like, right here.” Tweek showed him the offending part of his arm, “Y-you know I uusally tell people I don’t like to be touched but this was... k-kind of different, I don’t know...”

“Dude!” Craig crossed his arms, “What the hell? That’s not right. You hate being touched, she should know that, she can’t just reach over and-”

“Craig, hold on.” Tweek told him quickly, not intending to rile Craig up and clearly not as worried about it, “Listen. There was another thing.” he looked down, then back up, his blue eyes meeting with Craig’s, “She told me I was funny.”

“Wait, what?” Craig stopped in his tracks as well, then looked to the ground, “Were... you telling her a joke?”

“W-well, no, I mean, kind of, I guess?” Tweek admitted, running a hand in his hair, “I-I was just saying, um... I ended up saying that I-I kinda need coffee to think because I have a lot, uh, on my mind... but she thought I said latte, so it seemed funny, b-but it was the way she laughed man.”

“Wait, was she laughing at you?” Craig asked, “Does she need an ass-kicking?” he furrowed his brow.

“N-no, no, it was just like ‘Oh haha, Tweek, you‘re so funny!’” Tweek imitated.

“So?” Craig raised an eyebrow.

“Look, man, my dad knows a thing or two about flattering people. Helps sell stuff.” Tweek replied, “Most people don’t talk like that. Nobody says ’Oh, so-and-so, you’re so funny’. That’s what you say when you’re trying to make somebody feel good, or when you need to butter them up. I mean, Christ, I wasn’t even telling a joke.” he explained.

“So? Why does any of that matter? Maybe she just misunderstood you or something.” Craig asked him again.

“Th-there’s only three reasons she’d be trying to flatter me, dude.” Tweek told him, moving a little closer and looking around as he lowered his voice, “She’s either a spy working with the gnomes, o-or she wants free coffee, or just maybe, she likes me, man.” he mumbled.

“What?”

“I-I mean, it’s probably the first or second one, but... but man, could you imagine it? A girl liking me?” Tweek replied with a bit of a grin, unable to help himself.

“Who cares if some gross chick likes you, dude?” Craig asked, puzzled, the whole thing seeming totally irrelevant, before he noticed something in the distance, “Oh hang on, look, Heidi Turner, five o’ clock.” he pointed out. Heidi smiled from across the street and waved at them. 

Tweek ran a hand threough his messy blonde hair, rolling his eyes as he swiftly took hold of Craig’s hand again, lowering his voice further, “Yeah, but don’t you get it man? We wouldn’t have to do this anymore."

Craig waved at Heidi with his free hand, whispering in return, “What do you mean?”

“This, dude.” Tweek squeezed Craig’s hand, “Pretending we’re a couple, putting on a show for them every day.” Tweek explained, “We could finally call this whole charade off and stop having to live this lie. No more having to hold hands all the time when people see us, no more having to share milkshakes, none of it!”

As soon as Heidi had stopped paying attention and moved on with her walk, Tweek forced his hand away. Craig rubbed his forehead, “What? You mean like, we’d have to stop being friends?”

“What? N-no, I didn’t say that.” Tweek replied, “We can still be friends, nngh,” he twitched, “We’d just have to stage a big break-up or something, like last time. I mean, I wouldn’t make it about me this time, obviously, but...” he shook his head, “Whatever, the point is we wouldn’t have to pretend to be together.”

Craig looked down at the snow, feeling a pang of discomfort, before looking back up to Tweek’s blue eyes and his optimistic grin, “Dude, really?” They’d been pretending to date for a long time now. They were basically a town meme by now.

“Yeah.” Tweek replied, “Haven’t you ever thought about it?” he asked, raising an eyebrow, “You know, going back to our normal lives, dating girls, and not worrying about any of this? Not having to live up to everybody else’s expectations?”

“W-well, yeah, but I mean...” The truth was Craig had never really thought about it - he’d never wondered about an exit strategy to this entire thing, not since it was still fresh, “I guess I got kind of used to it...” he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck, “This whole... thing.” He couldn’t call it a lie - that didn’t feel right. Maybe it wasn’t what people thought, no, but... they’d spent a lot of time together, become really close... maybe it was kind of real...

“Come on, dude, we both knew this was never going to go on forever.” Tweek told him, confused. He didn‘t understand why Craig seemed to be having so much trouble with the concept, “You said it yourself, remember? ’I’m not gay and neither are you,’ ”

“Well, I mean, yeah, but dude, that was years ago.” Craig replied, looking away, feeling kind of uncomfortable now as the memories crept back, “I’m just trying to say maybe we shouldn’t...” he bit his lip, trying to find the words. He himself wasn’t completely sure what he’d meant. “I just don’t think we should rush into anything, jump to any conclusions.”

“Don’t jump to any conclusions? I’m just talking.” Tweek told him, confused, “All I’m trying to say is, it’d be cool to drop this whole act once and for all.” he twitched before resuming his walking, “Y-you’re acting strange. Are you feeling okay?”

Craig felt strangely wounded by that, rubbing his arm, “I’m not acting strange, you’re acting strange.” he insisted, “Come on dude, how do we know she really likes you?” he tried to ask, “She could just be after the free coffee, you said it yourself. Who cares what some dumb girl thinks anyway?” he rolled his eyes once again.

Tweek stopped again looked down at the cement, “I know, dude, I know... it’s probably not true.” he sighed, “No girl would ever like somebody like me...” his voice broke a bit, before he looked up to Craig, “B-but wouldn’t it... wouldn’t it be nice?” he’d always wondered what a real relationship might be like, what it might be like to run his fingers through someone else’s hair, to hold them close to him at night...

The sparkle in Tweek’s blue eyes seemed to disappear as he spoke, and suddenly Craig felt a more typical flash of confidence in himself, “Hey, hey, come on, it’s not crazy. There’s a lot of reasons someone could like you! I just mean, you know...” he put a hand on his pseudo-boyfriend’s shoulder, “I just don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“Come on though, dude. Think about it.” Tweek admitted, “My hair is messy and oily, my eyes are all baggy, I have terrible acne, I eat erasers all the time, my growth is stunted by all the caffeine, I wear a retainer, I’m lean, I’m weak, I’m submissive and lack self-confidence, what kind of a girl would want to deal with that, dude?” he asked, “I-I mean, sure, they all cheer us on because they think we’re gay, but would anyone of them really want to date me?”

“Dude, shut up.” Craig looked at Tweek, then away, “You’re just too hard on yourself. Plenty of girls are into blondes, you know.” he replied dismissively.

“Yeah, but what girl wants a lean short guy with zero self-confidence? Augh!” Tweek asked, crossing his arms and looking at the street, thinking about how alone he would be for the rest of his life.

The growing blush on Craig’s face wasn’t noticed, “It doesn’t matter, dude. You’re plenty good-looking, okay? Stop worrying what a bunch of dumb strangers think.”

“L-ook, I appreciate the sentiment, but... you’ve had it easy, man. You’ve had girlfriends before.” Tweek replied, “I’ve heard the stuff they say about you, how hot they think it is that you don’t give a fuck, how ’chiseled’ your muscles are, all that gross shit, how they hate that all the ’cute’ ones are gay...” he sighed, “What do I get? People think I look ‘cute’ with you. I-it’s like everything I do, only matters because it’s with you.” he shook his head, “Face it. What girl would want to date me?”

Craig didn’t have an answer for him. I mean, sure he could understand why someone might want to date Tweek, sure - he was attractive enough, and he could be very thoughtful and sweet, and he had a surprisingly strong moral center - but he supposed, he couldn’t be sure what a girl could see in him. Not that it mattered. “Look, dude, who needs girls?” Craig insisted, “You shouldn’t need some girl to tell you that you’re special.”

“I don’t!” Tweek replied, voice raised, before sinking down quickly , “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, you’re right...” Tweek sighed, “I’m sorry it’s just... it was just cool to think, for a minute, just p-pretend, that maybe Rebecca might’ve meant something, that maybe I won’t have to spend my whole life pretending to be something I’m not.”

“Yeah. That... sounds depressing.” Craig replied quietly, looking down at the cement himself, wondering why it seemed to bother Tweek so much, the whole thing. He didn’t feel too bothered by any of it. He never felt as if he’d been pretending to be something or someone he wasn’t. His relationship with Tweek had come very naturally to him.

“Exactly.” Tweek replied, and silence overcame the two of them as they continued to walk together. “Oh, hey, Red Racer’s not on tonight, right?”

Craig‘s eyes away from Tweek, “Oh, right, uh, it’s an old rerun, don’t worry about it. New episodes are only on Wednesdays.” he replied quickly, almost reflexively. 

“Cool.” Tweek nodded, the silencing returning, their homes in the distance having never felt further away before. There was a moment when he looked to Craig, as if he mighr say something, but twitched, and chose not to.

Craig remained quiet, wondering - why didn’t it bother him? Why did he feel so protective?

They had always known this was supposed to be a charade, but Craig had never really thought, until today, about how much more it seemed to bother Tweek than it did himself. This wasn’t the only time the subject had come up, and Tweek was usually animated in his desire to move on, and yet... Craig had never felt trapped.

The whole thing had felt more and more like kind of a weird blessing for Craig - while he’d never had trouble making friends with other kids, he had to admit he’d never felt very close to most people. He always liked to keep to himself, and there were many things he didn’t even talk about with his closer friends. He didn’t feel that kind of pressure to hide things or keep to himself with Tweek.

It was hard not to be concerned about his friend’s well-being, he knew. Few people knew Craig as well as Tweek did, but he was certain even fewer people knew Tweek as well as Craig knew him. He couldn’t bear to imagine someone, who clearly didn’t understand those specific needs, trying to force a relationship with Tweek and screwing it all up for him. He had to protect him.

I mean, how many people were willing to sit there and encourage Tweek through the most difficult levels of Assassin’s Creed even when he swore he couldn’t do it? Who could hope to figure out how to prepare coffee exactly the way Tweek likes it to calm his nerves? Who would stay up until past three in the morning to make sure the gnomes left him alone? How many people would have the raw patience to help him work through every little math problem?

How could he just stand there and let someone else, anybody else, try to commit to a relationship when they probably didn’t know what they were getting into? Sit by and let them hurt Tweek and make his anxiety and trust issues worse than they had ever been? Watch them pretend they knew Tweek better than he did? How dare they think they knew his Tweek better than he-

Oh.

That was when it really hit Craig like a ton of bricks, his heart seemingly to instantly sink into his cheat - why he was always so protective over Tweek’s well-being, why everything had come so naturally to him, why pretending had never felt so bad, and why losing their fake relationship seemed to bother him. It explained why every aspect of this had become so important to him.

It might’ve been a happy revelation, if he didn’t already know in his heart that Tweek didn’t feel the same way.

He had become so lost in his head, he didn’t notice as the two boys reached in front of Tweek’s House after several moments of silence. Tweek simply stayed put until Craig spoke up, “A-all right, nice talking to you, man, I... have to go make some coffee now, my anxiety’s flaring up again..” he twitched, “I’ll Skype you later or s-something.” he spoke quietly.

There were no ill feelings, but somehow that just made Craig feel a little worse.

“No problem, I’ll see you later.” Craig sighed, waving Tweek off with an even more awkward smile as his pseudo-boyfriend ran to his house to confront his proud parents. As soon as he was gone, Craig shoved his hands in his pockets, and his eyes moved back to the cement as he walked. He wondered if love was supposed to feel so... disappointing.

He flipped off a squirrel, but it didn’t make him feel better. He flipped off Filmore, but it didn’t make him feel better either. The feeling in the pit of his stomach remained as consuming as ever, the thought of Tweek’s gentle smile invading his head. Ugh. If only the Asians had made him fall in love with someone else, maybe, someone he was mutually compatible with.

Craig shook his head as he neared his home. They’d have to keep this up, sure, and he’d stay as protective as he’d always been, but he knew his feelings weren’t going away. He wasn’t sure how, or when exactly it happened, but he hide the thoughts from himself anymore. 

As he approached his home, Craig thought of the great irony that while Tweek had decided he wanted their relationship over with, Craig couldn’t help but feel like as if it had never really had the chance to start in the first place.

**Author's Note:**

> Leave a review, keep criticism constructive and thanks for reading!
> 
> Thanks, as always, to Rachel (Mad_Cow5678) for helping me out again with a crazy fic idea.


End file.
